Welcome to Grief Journals. I hope it’s a place where grieving men and their families will find comfort and support and not feel alone. And that every man will resonate with the issues I explore around the role of men in society and men’s mental health.
On 21st July 2021, my 36 year old son took his life. It was devastating and has of course changed my life and that of my wider family. Many of those changes won’t necessarily be a surprise, and certainly not for those of you who have been through a similar experience. However, I guarantee that there will be some that will shock and surprise you.
I don’t say that for effect. I’m simply recounting the experiences we’ve had over the past three years (as I write this). We’ve learned a lot about ourselves and about family, friends and the wider community. And if you’re going through something similar yourself, I’m writing this for you, to help reassure you that you’re sane and not alone. Some of the most grounding, supportive and loving conversations we’ve had, have been with parents who have also lost a child to suicide. Nobody else really gets it.
I now fully understand that over the past three years I’ve not been fully present, even though I’ve felt as though I have been. Like a deep sea diver needs a slow return to the surface, in order to prevent decompression sickness, the bends, our body, mind and spirit get together to formulate our own unique return to the surface from grief. And they only allow that to happen at the pace we can cope with.
With the help of Jack, my wonderful IT support, I’m making the website live on 20th December 2024, to mark the start of this new venture. Being ready to share the personal stories around my grief and what I’ve discovered along the way. About the support for grieving parents (or lack of), the hurtful things that family and friends do (or don’t do), the state of care for men’s mental health (or lack of), exploration around the role of men in society (and the lack of direction) and the huge subject of the root causes around why the suicide rate in young men continues to rise.
The site is currently mainly words. I’ll be adding images and more stories on a weekly basis. So, if what you’ve already seen has struck a chord, please sign up for my mailing list via the Contact Page and I’ll email you with a message every time there’s a significant update and a story has been added.
